Why A. I. G. Will Fail..

This is just a short post on what I see as obvious. A. I. G. is getting all kinds of negative publicity. Yet this is a company that relies on public confidence. Financial advisers, stock brokers and even you and I have a choice where we put our money. When more people decline to put their funds in the hands of A.I.G. executives, the company will naturally lose money.

So while we continually bail out A.I.G., threatening them with lawsuits and dragging the company through the mud only leads to their immanent decline. So Obama is not doing the country a favor by sending them hundreds of millions of dollars, then telling us what a terrible irresponsible company it is.

Obvious isn't it?

I will follow you into the dark..

Death Cab For Cutie - I will Follow You Into The Dark

Could make a great movie...

Ok, you probably know by now I have a sadistic sarcastic sense of humor. But to me, this would be a funny-ass movie. I am sure someone is going to steal my idea, so here it is.

It would take a bit of preparation with a pregnant woman and a hospital. When the mother is getting ready to have her baby, video tape the whole thing from arrival to departure. Here is where the preparation would need to be done. Everyone would need to walk backwards as they enter the hospital. (I'll explain later) If the expectant mother is put into a wheelchair, wheel her in backwards and make sure anyone visible in the shot is walking backwards.

You can tape the birthing process as normal. Make sure you tape everything from the water breaking to the afterbirth. Then again as the proud parents are leaving the hospital, everyone needs to walk backwards. Have the car that picks up the mother back (reverse) into the shot. Load the parents in and go home.

Here is what makes the whole thing funny. What we are going to do is actually view the tape in reverse. Since the voices will not work backwards, the whole film will need to be narrated and dubbed. And I think a crappier dub job would make it even funnier.

Start the move out with the mother and father arguing. The mother would eventually say something like "I wish we would never had a child". The father would say "I know a way we could fix the whole thing!".

This is when you roll the birthing tape backwards. Except now everyone will be walking forward. Show the mother being wheeled into the hospital holding her baby. Then (dubbed) the father would say "I want you to put the damn baby back where he came from!" They would then wheel the mother into the birthing room (tape still rolling backwards). You would start with the afterbirth and it would look like the mother was sucking the placenta back into her body (sound effects would help immensely). Then the umbilical cord, and eventually the baby. The scene would end with the mother re-absorbing the water from the initial water breaking.

The movie would end with the now pregnant again mother being released from the hospital. Now I have left out a lot of the more graphic ideas I had, but I am sure your imagination can fill in the details...

Nine Million Bicycles

Stuff you never knew you needed...

Technology is great! There is some stuff out there I bet you never knew existed.

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See where your special someone really goes with a personal gps tracker bug. http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.11314

Lord knows, we wouldn't want to hurt those pesky cockroaches. (read the reviews) http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.12643

Cool! a spy tie! http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.15614

Crap, you found my spy tie with you camera and bug detector pen. http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.14780

When a normal knock is just not good enough. http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.4533

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Wow, these are handy - USB powered heated gloves. http://www.dealextreme.com/details.dx/sku.2820

ok, that's enough...